80/20 Rule

80% of the time my desserts are all chocolate; 20% of the time they're not.

inspired by the Pareto Principle

Guns and Ammo

If bullets were replaced with chocolate, I'd work as a human practice target for free.

inspired by brilliant 7-year-old Myles and his letter to Pres. Obama

Genius

Whoever invented the Cupcake ATM needs to do the same for chocolate truffles.

inspired by midnight cravings

Scandal

MarshMellie at the White House with milk chocoLiv down the street

inspired by juicy season finales

IRS Audit

"No, your annual expenditures for chocolates don't qualify as medical care deductions for preventative mental health costs," the auditor said.

inspired by prescriptions for bliss

Wishful Thinking

You have one minute to grab as many chocolates as you can carry.

inspired by an empty wallet + a perpetual craving

Waste Not

Receiving chocolate and not eating it is like getting a present and not opening it.

inspired by William Arthur Ward

Appreciation

Giving chocolate is a generous act. It offers an excellent treat to others, who think excellent thoughts of the giver upon receiving and eating.

inspired by Voltaire

Freaky Thursday Fantasy

The fat and calories for a milk chocolate candy bar switched with those of a cucumber.

inspired by impossible dreams

Cuatro de Mayo

What? Cinco de Mayo Eve doesn't commemorate the night before Mexico vanquished France and liberated itself from French chocolate tyranny, adding cinnamon, other spices and ingredients to chocolate without restraint.

inspired by the 1862 Battle of Puebla

Benefits Package

Pleasure for one minute, a chocolate truffle. Pleasure for one hour, a box of chocolates; but pleasure for a lifetime, being a chocolatier.

inspired by an ancient Chinese proverb

May Day

If you want me to dance around a pole, it better have ribbons of chocolate streaming from it.

inspired by an ancient custom